Harrryyyyy Pottahhhh!
It’s only a month away: the final Harry Potter book.
I am staying far, far away from every Harry Potter-related article that’s not on the Rowling site itself, on the off chance that someone somewhere will throw up a spoiler and ruin the book for me. I had a movie that I had been very very excited about badly spoiled for me years ago and it only took that one time for me to learn my lesson.
I like to be surprised. I really love the Harry Potter stories. This is the last book in the series. Why do folks have to ridicule people who take delight in this kind of thing? I just dont get it. Fine, you think it’s stupid. Fine, you think it’s badly written (!?). Fine, you think the whole thing is ridiculous. The point is, I dont, and nobody said you had to. Go eat a bag of cocks and stop trying to ruin it for me. What is your problem, anyway?
Yes, I am eagerly anticipating book seven and anyone who spoils it for me dies painfully very shortly thereafter. Anyone who perpetrates spoilers on the unsuspecting is a vile, joyless meatsack. What the hell is wrong with these people? Who cares if you dont like whatever it is? Who pissed in your bowl of eternal cornflakes that you have to ruin it for someone else? I would never do that to someone, man. It’s just not cool, it’s not funny, and it’s not very nice, either. There have been plenty of things that I’ve thought were so downright fucking stupid that I couldnt wrap my mind around why anyone would appreciate it. I still wouldnt ruin it for someone else.
When I get the final Harry Potter book on 21st July I’m going to take the day off and read it right through without stopping. It will be the end of a long and utterly enjoyable relationship with a truly wonderful story, such as I haven’t had since I first discovered Lord of the Rings, although Tolkien was, of course, a far superior scribbler. I’m very sad it’s ending, and I’m very anxious to see what happens. I’m looking forward to it immensely, and I wish all fellow Potter fans the same delight.
I think the Harry Potter books are some of the most charming examples of literature ever published. If you dont, that’s terrific; you dont have to read them - just dont rain on my parade. It’s your right not to appreciate the same things I appreciate, but please, do us all a favour: Dont be a dick about it, yeah?




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